pieces of me.

-

i am a happy person.
just got stuck with so much drama,
almost to a point of emotional suicide.

i wish i could go get back my old self
my free spirited self.

im trying to...

i guess im trying too hard.

i hope i wont be pushing myself all the way thru.

-

i remember when i was young and my parents would
visit me during school breaks or sometimes even
when not on breaks. that early morning my dad
would wake me up to eat breakfast and he
would fix me with a glass of milk which
by the way i would cry infront of him coz i really hate the
taste of pure milk and drinking that one big
glass is just one perfect punishment for me.
and that everytime im done with it i would go inside
my bathroom and throw up coz it really feels icky.

he does that to make me comfy with milk and having these
lactose prob that i have.. well he thinks i might be
immune of it someday. which i did a bit.
i do like milk i mean it depends its like i go with
the taste that suits me and well eventhough
i got thru with the tasting part still i cant stand
it that long, i still end up seeking toilets.

i remember my mum usually cooks for us instead of
having someone to cook it for us. so our cook is pretty
much useless when she's around. i guess i got that part
of her. since i do love to cook.

i remember how my sis and i fight a lot, how she gets
my parents attention when she thinks i won over something.
we joke around we tease each other until it ends up with
a loud cry and pointing who did it first. anyways, since
im the eldest, the punishment tab's on me.

i remember when i dont have friends around when im in a different
place and that i dont know much of the people smiling at us. the
only one that's always by my side that i can get along with is my dog.
i always have him, my bestfriend with me, my dog. we just sit together
and like real bestfriends i put my arms around my dog and
talk to him like he was talking back. also, we do play a lot, he doesnt
do fetch like most NORMAL dogs do. we play wrestle,i tackle him
and not let him move for a couple of sec and he tackles me back by
grabbing my arms with his teeth but not to a point of hurting or biting me.
i just end up with some bite marks that ventually disappears a couple of minutes later.
my parents knew about our game and even watch us play.
one time he defended me from my big bully cuzn, we were fighting and
he saw me already on the floor crying, he scared my cuzn off and took me by the neck.it was like he was trying to pull a puppy out, it didnt hurt at all. he's the only dog that i have way back that my parents would let me have him sleep inside my room. why? coz they would tell him
to wake me up in the morning and yes he do wakes me up by pulling me out of the
bed by grabbing my ankle and feet and if i still wont get up, the next thing he'll do is lick me all over the face.which was really icky coz he does have this tongue streaming-saliva sometimes.

just too bad he cant be with me anymore since he got sick
and died when i was in highschool.

 
-

hey, did you know that i cut my nails
so often coz if i dont i definitely
will get ingrowns. well, its just that i
never learn how to cut my nails the right way.

did you know that i don't drink that much
water. its coffee, tea and juice.
so too much acids in my stomach is pretty much normal.
be very used to me complaining much about my tummy.

did you know that i hate rainy days and lightnings,
not that im scared of it, its just that i always
think weird about it. hey, there are so many cases
of someone struck by lightning.

and about the rainy day... most often my emotion goes with it.
(you know what i mean.)

did you know that my favourite place is my kitchen.
coz, its the easiest way to get out of stress.
visit me and you'll never get hungry!